Sunday Comments, February 22

Lines of the week:

• Maria "I don't think I'll ever feel like a girl again"
  
• Claire "Will it be peas? will it be prunes?"
  
• Claire "Sally Webster You're a genius!"
  
• Maria to Liam "You're going to leave me aren't you?" (scuse me, who left who here?)
  
• Ashley "I told Claire what i think" Kevin "I told Sally too" (and it won't make a blind bit of difference)
  
• Carla to Liam "I can't believe she's doing this to you!" (neither can i!)
  
• Sally to Kevin "If we're moving across the road, i want you to make more of an effort. Cans of beer in a conservatory are just not right!"
  
• Kevin to Ashley "You get on with your little notepad and i'll get on with the wine cellar"
  

I don't understand why everyone, before they knew what was wrong, would automatically assume Maria is on a 3 day strop over a minor thing. The first day yes, but for her to overreact like this (in their eyes), wouldn't you think they'd start to worry there was something else going on? Apparently not. And there is
Maria, really wigged out, poor lass. But alas, Liam found out the hard way, from a midwife come to check on her. And Audrey found out from the certificate. And here the poor girl is, day after losing her baby, it's her birthday. Nice. Maria not telling Liam about it all is going to be very hard for him to forgive. That silly silly girl, all she can say is "don't leave me"... She's gone far beyond pleading grief and shock. She didn't tell him because she was jealous and insecure. And it was a stupid, stupid decision to make. All the times she "tried to tell him" she didn't try very hard. She didn't make him shut up and listen.

Even after it's all out in the open, she keeps ducking and diving and then throwing Carla back in his face. She runs back to Audrey and leaves him on his own in shock and grief. What else is he going to do? Turn to Carla. She was the first one that held her arms out for comfort. Should have been Maria. I'm sorry if i'm being harsh, i know in real life i would never presume, but it's a soap so i think i've got a bit more leeway. It's all contrived to push Liam back into Carla's arms, after all. She was even the one to drive Liam back to talk to Maria and Maria saw that and you just know it fueled the fire even more. I always knew Maria was thick and not very bright but she's proving to be a complete idiot. It seems like she's completely given up on Liam, letting Carla win and she's going to push him right into her bed. Liam really didn't want Carla once he'd married Maria but Carla has been there for him and Maria hasn't. That's going to make a huge difference in how he feels about her.

We do know that Maria is mad with grief but she's also mad with jealousy and insecurity. She's made it all about her and that's not what it is about. Well the vicar even assumed Carla was Liam's wife. That's got to be the most heartbreaking sight, seeing a parent carrying that wee coffin. The churchbells made it even more mournful. Maria made it at the very last minute and got an eyeful of Carla at Liam's side. Will she go through with it and say goodbye to her baby?

Carla really can be an unpleasant bitch, isn't she? Still, when it came down to it, she was the one that showed Liam more caring than his wife did. In many ways! Audrey told Bill to have a fry up at Roy's. But he's banned from there isn't he? And would Roy be open for breakfast on a bank holiday? We've seen that vicar before, you know. He married Jason and Sarah most recently i think. GAil's working up the nerve to call her long lost father. That'll be next week.

Boy it didn't take Bookie Senior long to get his feet behind the bar did it? With all these phone calls from the ex, i wouldn't be surprised if we meet her soon. I gotta see the woman that's been leading Harry around by the wallet! I think there is going to be trouble, with Julie and Fiz both fussing over Chesney. Cilla's living in a trailer with an Elvis impersonator. I could have predicted that.

Ashley and Claire are feeling the credit crunch. How relevant! How on earth could they have money tied up in the house when the house was given to Ashley as a wedding present when he married Maxine? Insurance would have paid for the fire damage unless Ashley's taken out a mortgage on it to help the business but that wasn't mentioned. Claire has a part time job and Ashley would have got the money from the sale of the pub to Steve. If the business is that bad, having gone through all that money that fast, he should have declared bankruptcy ages ago, they wouldn't be just a little short of what they need to live daily. Contrived. Contrived. Contrived. Claire is just as annoying as Maxine was, you know? Squashing small soap bits into a ball? Sally comes up with the idea and now they're going to sell their house. I don't think it's going to go as smoothly as the women think it will. I can understand Ashley being reluctant to leave the house that was his dad's and Kevin? Well he never was one for change, liking things as they are. But when the women want their way, nothing is going to stop them. They know how to work the men. I'll tell you though, I'm heartily enjoying Sally's upwardly mobile snobbishness getting a fresh airing. The higher she soars, the harder she's going to hit when it all goes pear shaped. It was funny watching them trail around after the estate agent with Kevin and Ashley commiserating.

So Steve locked the keys in the car... how? And why doesn't the cab office have spares? Sean's back. I forgot he was away. He was gone an awfully long time for a sun holiday wasn't he yet Marcus said Sean was back early? No matter, Thank GOD Lauren didn't come back with him!!!!! Les has just sprung the news that he won't be back for another year and Ches pretends he doesn't mind. But he does, really. Julie really seems to be taking over with Kirk and Chesney and Fiz seems a bit jealous. She's certainly getting on Fiz's nerves if nothing else.

Tina actually did come to see David and his roomie Graeme is pretty impressed. I like Graeme, he's off the wall but a real breath of fresh air, too. David and Tina are back together. He promises she won't regret it. I'm dubious, meself.

Sunday Comments, February 15

Lines of the week:

• Vernon "Who is the greatest husband in the world" Liz "Gissa clue"
  
• Jack to Paul "You are your father's son all right! Get OUT!"
  
• Becky "Do you know what i don't get?" Roy "The London Review on Books?"
  
• Audrey "You did leave sommat behind" Ted "Something important?" Audrey "She is to me!"
  
• Janice to Leanne "You seem to get off on doing dodgey things." (pot? kettle?)
  
• Dan to Leanne "Panic over. No further action"
  
• Rita "It'll be like an Officer and a Gentleman" (remember this in about 10 months' time, k?)
  

Leanne is like a cat on hot bricks wondering what Paul is up to. He made his statement and implicated everyone and then he "confessed" to Jack and Ty and Molly too. The problem is it's the old little boy calling Wolf isn't it? Will they believe him? Jack has it spot on as usual. Paul only confessed to get back at Leanne, not because he felt guilty about doing it. How disappointed must Jack be!!! We've not seen him that drunk for ages, not even after Vera died. I'm rather glad Paul overheard Tyrone insulting him. It's not as if it was a surprise anyway. Well the police weren't slow in coming to talk to Leanne and Monkey Boy. Now, can Leanne keep her cool? MB probably can. They weren't arrested, just questioned. So how come they were "released on bail"? It didn't take long for the gossip to ramp up, between Lloyd and Blanche. Good God, because Paul went to the police, the insurance isn't paying out. Nobody gets anything! Damn straight Leanne will make sure Paul fries and she gets off. I would really enjoy seeing Paul's spoiled smug face looking sideways behind bars. I really would.

Now Janice has found out about the whole scheme too. Leanne can lie but she can't lie to Janice. I don't understand how Janice can be on such a high horse about Leanne doing dodgey or illegal things. She's certainly not above it herself. And ok, she's not as bad as Cilla was and maybe Janice really is an honest person .... wayyyyyyy down deep! Paul's charged with the arson and Jack seems to be speaking to him again, even willing to pay for a solicitor. If Leanne can hold her nerve, she might get away with it. And she did!

Audrey got hold of Ted and they are going to meet up! She's so preoccupied that she forgot she was taking Gail to get her plaster off. Anyway, we get to meet her long lost love. Ted. He seems quite nice and very dapper. Poor Ted, though, what a shock he got. And afterwards, Audrey's imagination was threatening to take flight, comparing him to blue collar Bill. Are you picking up any hints yet? Because you should be but i won't say what the conclusion you should be drawing is, in case you don't already know.

Liam, Maria, Carla and Tony almost seemed like they were mates at the start of the dinner party, making jokes and that. Maria didn't even stay though and what happened? Liam passed out on the sofa. Carla should have rang Maria, even if it was late. Didn't Liam get his self out of Carla's fast in the morning but he had to face the music when he got home. I think Ozzy agreed with Maria's ranting too. Maria probably wouldn't be so upset if it hadn't been Carla alone in the flat, given their history. Well she's soon got something more important to worry about. Marcus seems awfully worried about Maria's baby not moving much. That's his job and he knows whereof his speaks. And the scan proved the tragic news, the baby has died and Maria had to give birth to it anyway. It must be the worst nightmare, poor kid. I can't imagine how awful that must be and she never told Liam! Problem is, her jealousy is making her think Liam was *with* Carla, and possibly blaming Liam and and Carla was just winding her up further. I just hate it when you watch this sort of thing and know it's an obvious plot device. Any other time, the row would have been over in 10 minutes but they had Carla continuing to wind her up and having her moan about Liam and then when she finally found him, he was all sweet and contrite and loving about the baby and she *couldn't* tell him then. And the next day, after she slept on the settee, he got all growly again and didn't give her a chance.

I think she's just blinded by grief and not thinking straight and Liam being so defensive isn't helping her get any words out. It's contrived, i know. And Poor Marcus in the middle, he nearly let the secret out. Did you see his face when Liam said he thought Maria overreacted (until he realized Liam didn't know what was going on)? Naturally Marcus would go so Maria would have someone there. Another jerk of the heartstrings... did they have to show that wee little hand? *gulp* She couldn't even go home, she went to Audrey's.

There's definitely cracks in the Tomlin union, when the wife can't stand the idea of spending three weeks on a cruise boat with her husband. Now, while the cool cat's away, will the little mouse play away? Hmmm Claire's finances don't seem to be in very good order. Ashley was trying to keep the business going and kept it quiet so she wouldn't worry. What is it with these people that keep crucial information secret from their spouses???? There's a vast difference, and i do mean *vast* between seeing Jason in his boxers and seeing Jerry Morton in his.

Becky and Jason definitely going to give it another try. She's a bit cautious after last time... for about 10 seconds. She really likes him, you can tell. Becky got away quick in the morning, nearly as fast as Liam. Guess she didn't want to face Eileen. She didn't know she was going to have to face Roy's disapproval though. She stayed out all night and with a married man!

Sunday Comments, February 8

Lines of the week:

• Rick "A walking talking creamcake" (All over your face)
  
• Audrey to Gail "One day darling, one of them (relationships) will stick"
  
• Becky "Tripod. Dog. Three legs"
  
• Dan about the bread "White. Thick sliced. Like me"
  
• Roger "The place is a burned out hollow shell!" Leanne "You always look on the bad side!"
  
• Leanne "I always land on me feet" (you hope!)
  
• Gail to David "I forgive you" (well you never thought she wouldn't!)
  
• Dev to Betty "Would you say i'm more like a choclate eclair or a marshmallow?" Betty "Neither! A bar of fruit and nut!"
  
• Kirk to Fiz "Why would i want to get back wi'you?" (um, up to 2 weeks ago it's all you wanted!)
  
• Julie "I'd been batting off lounge lizards all night (looks at Dev) No offence!" (*snork*)
  

David's gone down and Gail's turned 50! What a day! Claire and Deirdre bringing the party to Gail? Strange pair. I think it was kind of insensitive to schedule a party on that day when it was almost a certainly that David would be convicted. Even stranger that Eileen would be invited and a few other of the guests seemed out of place too. I mean... Dev? But he was the one that got her to smile when it was all done and dusted. And the most obvious person that should have been there was not to be seen. Sally, Gail's best friend! Gail's probably right, if she did swan off to Milan, David would take it very personally. Sarah getting mother's attention yet again, getting one up on him. Audrey thought she should stay there overnight in case Gail got drunk, as she poured herself another drink and made her own drunken speech and put her foot right in it. Meanwhile David is using his one phone call to leave a message on Tina's answering machine. At the end of the day it was Gail consoling Audrey and David was in tears in the dark.

The new cellmate, Graeme, seems a bit "sandwich short of a picnic" doesn't he? Is he really a psycho or is he just winding David up? You wouldn't think Gail would be allowed to visit the very next day that David was incarcerated. Nice of Jerry to rescue her from a lack of a cab even if he nearly gassed her with the stench of onions in the car! I like Jerry and Gail, they could be good mates. David actually seemed genuinely glad to see his mother, too. It was pretty emotional and then it was over and Gail was in the house all by herself. No David, no mother, no half-hearted partiers. David also seems to have had his eyes opened quite sharply, hasn't he? He seems to genuinely realize that though he's had some rough times (Hillman, divorced parents) he really hasn't had it all that bad and it seems like he really does realize he has to take responsibility. His apologies seem genuine. Something tells me he's not going to be a completely changed person mind you, but we won't see the out of control David of old I don't think.

Harry keeps has these acrimonious phone calls with is ex-wife. I wonder if we're ever going to meet this woman that seems to be able to tie Harry up in knots all the time. Paul's got a new job. Frying in a kitchen. It's made him even more angry at Leanne for robbing him of a good job. She shouldn't have pretended "it just didn't work out" meaning her and him as a couple when it wasn't even on the table to start with. it was insulting to him, really. Mistake! He's demanding all of the insurance payout! He figures he has Leanne up against a hard place. Dan wasn't helping matters, goading him so he's made the call. Talk about throwing your rattle out of the pram! I don't think you're going to see big things out of that actor that plays Paul Clayton. I don't know what annoys me more, his eye rolling or the way he turns his head and looks sideways at the person in front of him. Anyway, Molly's figured out Paul has feelings for Leanne. Tyrone isn't bothered.

Oh heck. That bloke Becky's "dating" has a girlfriend and a kid but at least he told Becky. She acted like it was none of his business but boy didn't she give him a good pasting! or Cream caking! It looks pretty clear that Becky and Jason still like each other. Audrey's skeptical, but it doesn't look like Sarah is coming back. Still, Becky could be Jason's rebound and she could get hurt just the same. Leave it to Betty to hit the nail on the head every time. What the heck is it with Dev these days fawning all over everyone???

Tony finally gave in to Roy and contributed 10,000 to a preservation society. Liam and Carla seem to be getting along well. Having a laugh and all that. Kirk came back from the sun and it's Fiz that has a tan. Fiz was so worried about Kirk coming back and look! He's got a new girl! And she seems to think Kirk is deep, clever, dry sense of humour.... and if you didn't know he was like that you might think... um... well she's going to realize it sooner or later but she genuinely seems to like him for his good heart and that he does have.

Ryan doesn't want to share the family holiday with Michelle and Alex. I just want them to go away. Vernon is still whinging. Cold sores. and lets everyone know. There has to be a better way of getting his wife's attention. He's offering to work? Vernon? Or just want to redesign the menu. He's on a roll. Is he developing a gambling problem? Or just giving Liz another excuse, i.e. gambling, losing and then making sure nobody tells Liz. And i'm surprised that Dan lets Lloyd in the shop after he had all that trouble getting Lloyd to pay up when they first took over the shop. I'm surprised Lloyd would want to give them his business. He's all over town in a cab all day, it's not as if he couldn't find another bookies to use. Conveniently forgotten i guess. Liz and Harry are doing some heavy flirting, too.

Ted Page, an old flame of Audrey's from 50 years back. Gail's 50. We have already heard that name before when Audrey told her that was her father's name. Looks like we're finally going to meet him! His name sure had ruffled Audrey's feathers. Ted never knew Audrey was pregnant. Boy is he going to get a surprise. Audrey's telling Rita and she's telling Maria but not told Gail yet so she'd better do it herself or it's going to get back to Gail anyway.

Tony's going to China. He doesn't figure Jason and Becky are a good match. Becky's got no class? Maybe that's the attraction! Anyway, he's invited Liam and Maria to dinner. Huh? Liam and Maria both looked a bit taken aback at that. Dev's a marshmallow, all fluffy and no substance. A fluffy ditherer. I'm with Amber. He's exactly that. We did get an update on Sunita and the twins. Blooming and 2 and a quarter year old. So now there's a basketball net in the Rovers back yard, a kiddie table and chairs and a smoking shelter. Nice.

Sunday Comments, February 1

Lines of the week:

• Deirdre "We had a very steep learning curve with Tracy" Ken "it was more of a direct ascent"
  
• Tony "Do I look like a murderer?" Carla "Frankly, yes" (you might want to remember this conversation, Carla but I'm saying nowt)
  
• Truck driver to Roy "Is that your final word?" Becky "I can think of two more!"
  
• Paul "I may be a loser but i'll still take the money" (as long as you know)
  
• Roy "Jason's not the brains behind this operation." Becky "Jason's not the brains behind anything"
  
• Foreman "We're going to have to call the police" Roy "Feel free to use the phone inside the cafe"
  

Gail skwawking at the judge isn't going to do much good. It's not as if it was a trial where people give evidence. She's just desperate that he doesn't go to jail but it seems he knows or at least needs to in order to finally take responsibility. After all that, i don't suppose he'll *still* get the councilling he needs. You can understand the neighbours being annoyed at the destruction but does Janice *have* to gob off at the top of her lungs like that every time? It's as if they don't know what else to do with her. You'd think after all the stunts Les has pulled over the years that had her hiding her face in shame, she's be more understanding, like Ken and Deirdre. I loved Claire putting her in her place, bringing up the fact that her own (step) daughter was a prostitute. David is doing the right thing, he knows it but he's still scared about going to prison and that's a good thing. He might actually realize he's got to turn his life around. There's something you don't see very often, David hugging his mother... sincerely. He seems sincere all around, leaving a letter for Tina and apologizing to Ken. He even remembered his mother's birthday! Can't blame Gail for not being in the birthday mood but look, Tina's back but not for long. She broke up with David. Didn't she already do that? No really, I mean it this time? Anyway, he got four months, which means he'll be out in half the time as per usual.

So Roy and Becky have compromised and she' promises not to have lads overnight that are one night stands. And the very next thing, she's having that Rick fella over as soon as Roy's left for an evening at the pub. Well, it *is* the second date after all. She still didn't quite get the concept of respecting his space, did she? But that served to have Roy on the street when Jason came by after the smoke-out. Odd, Roy remembered seeing Jason but he didn't remember smelling smoke on him and by rights, Jason should have been reeking of it. Jason shouldn't have reminded Roy he was "just out for a walk". That only serves to put it in the front of Roy's mind. Now that the bats have been shifted, and the inspector knows something funny is up, Roy is on one of his classic missions starting with a sit-in which lasted about 30 seconds but parking Hayley's Woody car across the site was a much better plan. it was quite neatly executed, wasn't it? I"m willing to bet not too many people can get the better of Tony Gordon. Roy insisting on cash, for a charity, was SO Roy! Hayley will be proud!

We went through all that palaver for a smoking shelter that looks little more than a picnic table with a cover over it. Ok, it's a brick wall up the back and a trellis on the side. Doesn't look like it could hold more than two people back to back and i bet it's going to film like it's the size of the entire yard! Apparently they built another door out into the yard as well. Pretty clear that Bookie senior has taken a liking to the Rovers landlady. If he wasn't such a smooth operator and an obvious ladies' man, i'd say he and Liz were well suited. He's certainly more her type than Vernon is. I'm a bit surprised that Liz would be so shirty with Vernon over the bet he won but with all the aggro he caused over the smoking shelter, i suppose it's understandable. Still, when more and more things start to irritate you about your partner, there's a problem. So will they work it out or will it be the end of them?

Jason went ahead and smoked out the bats to keep his and Bill's jobs. He looked so funny didn't he? Now he's done Tony's dirty work, though, the ice is broken. Poor Jason isn't bright enough to really stand up to Tony and he's not bright enough to withstand direct questioning. I hope he's not getting in too deep. Doesn't look like Michelle has learned any lessons and she's as single minded as ever. Making plans with Alex and leaving Ryan in the dark about it. You can be sure Nick is rubbing it in Alex' face that he's spending time with Ryan but Michelle wouldn't be doing that, it would only be common courtesy but she had blinkers on. You might say Ryan and Alex would never be friends but i figure, over time, they could get along ok, once they realize Michelle loves them both. But it will be a very long time. She finally told her mother and father about the situation, months after it happened (wouldn't you tell your mother first thing?) and what's the first thing Mammy Connor does? Want to make sure Ryan's ok. At least someone thinks of Ryan first.

I thought Lauren was only working at the pub on trial? The way she behaves and with her slack timekeeping, you'd think the trial would be abruptly over. Liz didn't find out Steve gave her and advance after she said no, but Lauren swanning off on holiday did at. One can only hope. Poor Darryl, he's managed to get shot of Lauren but figures it was his fault for not being cool enough. I don't think it was that. You don't need to be cool, just need to have a steady stream of cash. Her next target is Sean, wanting him to go on holiday, meaning he pays. And as soon as she's bled him dry, she'll drop him too. How many places of business will let you have time off at the drop of a hat? Most of the businesses on Coronation Street apparently. Sean and Lauren are going on holiday and Michelle is swanning off to Ireland and nobody blinks. That's pretty much all the staff isn't it? It'll just be Liz and Betty. Vernon's no help and Steve has two businesses to run. Meanwhile, poor Darryl doesn't see much future for himself. All that upset over quitting the shop came to not much at all though Jerry *says* he'll be more considerate. That'll be the day.

Paul's getting pretty worked up, isn't he? It's all just festering inside. He's got as much to lose as Leanne does and probably more since he lit the match. We know what a good liar Leanne can be but if Paul decides to take them both down, will she be able to get out of it?