Sunday Comments, November 30

Lines of the week:

• Audrey to Maria "You don't need luck my darling" (with Carla skulking around? Yes she does!)
  
• Liam about Maria "Maybe she's smarter and deeper than you think" (and maybe not)
  
• Kirk "Why does everyone automatically think i'm useless?" (something about the dog sleeping on your suit, i think)
  
• Liam "Don't wave that thing at me." Maria "That's funny, that's exactly what I said to you at one o'clock this morning"
  
• Vernon on a Rovers refit "I'm thinking leather" Liz "And that's just for the staff!"
  
• Fiz "I wish someone adored me like that" Kirk.... gazes.
  
• Janice "Cruella's cryin'!" (but not out of sentimentality!)
  
• Jack, spotting Rita and Emily at high noon "Man eating pensioners!!!"
  
• Sean to Vi "I'm not boring you am i?" Violet "Yes!!!"
  
• Becky "Can I be honest?" Roy "As opposed to your normal velvet gloved diplomacy?"
  
• Becky "Nothing can possibly go wrong" (aaaaghh!)
  

You know that horrible fascination you get by watching a black widow spider consuming her mate? I think that's probably why headgear like Carla's is called a "Fascinator". Really. Ugliest. Wedding. Hat. Ever. It looked like a spider about to consume her head! Fiz's hair looked awful, that big heavy pancake of hair over her forehead. If Carla's intent was to walk into that wedding looking like the scarlett woman and stun Liam, she succeeded but not in the way she planned. Maria did really look nice. I loved her dress and it so suited her. I know there are Carla-Liam fans out there but i just can't buy it. She's hard faced (nearly literally) and bitchy and bad tempered and Maria is pretty and sweet and girl-next-door. Yes, Maria is a bit shallow but she's a nice person. Why would Liam realy want to be married to the queen bitch? But going to her flat is only fanning the flames. I don't think Liam is as complicated as Carla thinks and that's why i think he and Maria are a better match. By going to her flat, it only makes it look like he's trying to convince himself as well as her. Unfortunately, it's a soap, so i suppose they're supposed to be star crossed lovers. She comes back to his place, and tries to find out if he has feelings for her like she says she has for him. There's something? lust. She just wants something that she can't have.

Anyway, Maria certainly had her wobble on her wedding day after seeing Carla all over Liam the night before. seeing text messages from Carla telling him not to marry her and seeing Carla stalk them in the gardens. Can't blame Maria, really, can you? She prevailed, though and got her own back in the ladies' with a resounding slap to Carla's cheek. Unusual choice for a wedding march wasn't it? That was Wonderwall by Oasis, in case you didn't know. And did Maria know his middle name was Barrington? I really don't know why Carla would have stayed for the reception after the man she so ardently persued married someone else. Have a little pride, woman! And do you honestly believe that Carla would stand in line waiting to catch the bridal bouquet? Well she didn't, actually, she was just standing on the dance floor when the gaggle of women and Sean gathered for it. After that, a night in a lovely hotel and then off to Venice for their honeymoon, leaving Carla to drink herself to sleep and go back to Tony with her tail between her legs. The rest of the wedding wasn't without it's bumps when that pernicious little git showed up whining about his mommy. So much for the promise Michelle made to Ryan just before the wedding. More about that in a minute.

Ken in the cafe? Oh come on. It's at least one or two steps up from trolley pusher! Blanche could have a field day with that or she would have if she hadn't been so insulted that she wasn't asked. Well let's face it. She doesn't do anything except pour the odd cup of tea and sit there and gossip. Did you see the shot of Amy sitting on the floor at the wedding with Ozzy? Cute! So Vernon and Liz think the pub should have a facelift. Well it *is* about time, it's not been redecorated since the fire gutted it in 1986! Emily and Rita are bound and determined to make sure Jack isn't lonely. Good God he just lost his wife. Let the man have a bit of time to grieve! Jack told Junior Bookie that he'd put a bet on the day Vera died. Um. they were in Blackpool all day that day! Oh wait, Tyrone put it on for him but now nobody can find the betting slip and Vera put it somewhere safe. Vera? Wouldn't you think that if Vera knew Jack was betting she'd have thrown it out for spite?

More Alex-shenanigans. First winding up Michelle about surmising that Dean would have wanted him to live with them, making sure she knows he doesn't get on with his parents. Then showing up at the wedding and pushing everyone of Michelle's buttons. (They're way out in the country. How did Alex even get out there on his own?) How's she going to explain that one away. He says Nick is always shouting at him. It's no wonder. He's not likeable at all. Sneaky, Passive agressive, whiny and childish. I hate the way Steve always gives in to Michelle and lets her off the hook so easily. Steve never did have a backbone where women were concerned. Ryan probably does feel like Alex is trying to take over and his mother can't seem to draw the line and even if she did, Alex would take no notice. It's quite an upheaval for both kids and probably a no-win situation for Michelle. Alex keeps showing up in spite of repeatedly being told to stay away and wait while things get sorted. He even managed to tell Norris the nuts and bolts of the story, one of the worst gossips on the street, ensuring it would get out in the open. Then he deliberately got into some trouble so that the cops could take him to Michelle because he said it was his home. See what i mean? Norris nearly went out of his tiny mind trying to get to the bottom of the gossip!