Characters I'd cull - Brian Park, eat your heart out

(This post was originally posted by Graeme N on the Coronation Street Blog in October 2012.)

Before I begin, I should make clear that my comments are directed at the characters, not the actors, who I am sure are lovely people, however much their television personas irritate this particular Coronation Street viewer.

In no particular order, here are the present characters I would despatch, the reasons why and how I would arrange for their departures:

Tina McIntyre - In days gone by, younger characters would be portrayed as fun-loving, carefree and up for a good time. Think Trisha Hopkins, Suzie Birchall and Gail Potter (albeit briefly). Unfortunately the writers took Tina from Suzie to present day Gail almost overnight. In four years she has lost a deranged father to Lake Windermere, accused Gail of murder, forgotten more boyfriends than she ever knew and is now contemplating life as a surrogate mum. And why does she never mention her own mother, come to that? Exit: Rita pays for her to go to Switzerland so experts can remove the many layers of Caramac she has smeared on her face over the years. She never returns.

Tommy Duckworth - I hesitated over this one, but any man who can walk about in public wearing a t-shirt with "Male Model" on it should really be on the first Wayfarer out of Weatherfield. Exit: Dad Terry "two chairs" Duckworth returns (briefly), selling Tommy back to  grandma Doreen in Blackpool. With no Des Barnes around to attempt a rescue, Tommy is soon forgotten.


Dev Alahan - Next up is a character well past his sell-by date. Originally conceived as a 21st Century Mike Baldwin, the only similarity I can see is they have both shared a bed with Deirdre Barlow. A dubious claim to fame. Dev always appears to be in rehearsal for pantomime which is a great shame as the Rovers Select disappeared in 1986. His highlight was Mad Maya's reign of terror, but that was mostly down to Maya and not him. By the way, whatever happened to the 76 other children he was alleged to have spawned? Exit: Mad Maya should return and finish the job she started 8 years ago.

Stella Price - Stella has never worked for me, no matter how many storylines she is shoe-horned into. I won't mention the accent (oops, just did) - her ultimate low was involving herself in packing up Betty's belongings having never met the woman. I understand why she was written into those scenes, even though the story was ill-thought through and factually inaccurate. Her continued presence makes me uncomfortable and I don't see that changing. Exit: Disappears into the back room of the Rovers, never to be seen again.

My final choice was a tough call between Tracy-luv Barlow and Michelle two sons Connor.   
Michelle should have been ditched after the dreadful baby-mix-up storyline which appeared to last for 17 years. However, if I had to choose it would be Tracy. A character with no redeeming qualities, on a merry-go-round of never-ending evil storylines, she never gets what's coming to her. And I hate what her character has done to Deirdre. Exit: Could the lovely Charlie Stubbs come back from the dead and exact suitable revenge? 

I feel much better for getting that out of my system! 



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