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Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Tram Crash week awards
Hero of the week: Gold Star: Ashley, R.I.P.
Silver Star: (tie) Ciaran and Jason.
Bronze Star: everyone else that helped get someone out from under the rubble.
Chump of the week: Gold Star: John Stape for hammering Charlotte and putting her *into* the rubble!
Beat me with a guilty stick award: Gold Star: Carla, who was the one that sent Nick back to tell Peter about the affair.
Forget men, stick with women award: Gold Star: Carla again. She's lost her brother-in-law, Dean, her first husband, Paul, her lover, Liam, all to sudden violent accidents and her second husband Tony blew himself up. Now the one she is in love with is still not out of the woods after an accident as well and she's lost the one friend she's got.
Private Hell award: Gary and his Afghanistan flashbacks.
That solves that problem award: Gold Star: Molly did say she was leaving Tyrone and she wouldn't be back. She was right.
Silver Star: Charlotte's brain-dead and her parents ask "Colin" if they should take her off life support. Doh.
Silver Star: Charlotte introduced Colin John as her fiance!
Hitting the wall award: Tie: Tyrone and Molly's marriage is over.
Nick asked Leanne to marry him.
The Witch is Back award: Gold star: Carla was in one miserable mood! She left no stitcher unscathed. Mind you, don't blame her for giving them hell after they started to rib her about the drink driving charge.
Instigator award: Gold Star: Carla sending Ken to the bar to discover Nick and Leanne
Silver Star: Jim certainly enjoys winding up Owen and look where it got him! But Owen seems to have got the hump too. (But no Liz in town for the 50th week???)
Fashion award of the week: Sean's knitted hat!
Fashion Don't of the week: Fiz is now the proud owner of the unrealistic fake baby bump.
Rock and a hard place award: Stony Star: Ken... should he tell Peter and risk him drinking? or keep the secret? Really, now that Leanne knows he knows, it's none of his business. Let Leanne deal with it.
He's not just a pub owner award: Sloshed star: Owen needs to drive Steve to the hospital? Doesn't Steve own a cab firm?
There's no way to award any stars in particular for performance of the week. They were all astounding, even the ones that I don't normally find all that good.
Lines of the week:
Ashley: "It's a stag night, what's going to happen?" (Oh Ashley!)
John: "Anyone can hit a nail with a hammer" (and a bigger target is even easier)
Dr. Carter: "What's the worst that could happen?" Tina: "Well you might not get out of here alive"
Nick: "That's the last time I have a stag do in here!"
Simon: "It's a bit smoky up there!"
Norris: "The vision of Hell itself"
John to Fiz "After tonight, Colin will be out of our lives forever" (Sez you?)
Sally about Carla "She's like a demented lion tamer!"
Molly to Kevin "You've made your position clear. You don't want us and we don't want your guilt money!"
Sally "You!? Volunteering to take *me* shopping? There's definitely something wrong with yer dad!" (Guilt money?)
Charlotte "Why should i be stuck here along with ugly, bitter thoughts?" (because you're an ugly, bitter woman!)
Ken "I think I know when two people are having an affair" Deidre "Well you should do, you've had enough experience!"
Deirdre to Ken "Who hasn't asked for a second chance?" (point!)
Owen to Jim "The trick is knowing which pubs you're not welcome in" (and Jim's not stupid, so he isn't!)
John "Who said size isn't everything!?" Katy "I don't know but I bet it were a bloke!"
Peter "It's going to take more than Nick Tilsley to steal you away from me!"
Molly to Sally: "He chose you because you are beautiful inside and out"
Carla: "You didn't choose Peter. You married him for his expiry date" (Ouch)
Sally: "Did you bother running or was that just fancy dress?" and "Nothing like a tumour in your wife's breast to shake you out of a midlife crisis!"
There were Phrases of Doom all over the place, weren't there? Carla saying a lot can happen in a week and Peter saying how happy he is etc. I shudder.