Wednesday 2 January 2013

A very Corrie Christmas - 1980s style

(This post was originally posted by Clinkers (David) on the Coronation Street Blog in December 2012.)

It was the decade of greed and high camp, as made popular by Margaret Thatcher and Alexis Colby. Not that any of this affected our little corner of Weatherfield, save for Bet Lynch's shoulder pads getting bigger. Christmases come and go on the Street. Here's a potted history of the festive highlights . . .

1980 sees Emily wallowing in misery thanks to her bigamist husband Arnold. Poor old Elsie was saddled with her Brummie grandson Martin and his girlfriend. Decked out in a bad wig and a new frock, Hilda hosts a Christmas party which ends ups with Fred Gee scrapping with a binman for the affections of Audrey Potter.

Let's all gather around the yuletide table of newlywed Deirdre Barlow as she entertains Albert, Alf and (lock up your sherry) Emily. Top of the 1981 gift list has to be Stan's show of appreciation for Hilda - he bought her an air freshener!

1982 brought scenes of an horrific nature at the Community Centre dance. Victor Pendlebury marched Emily around the dance floor whilst Chalkie Whiteley helped himself to a handful of Elsie. Jack and Vera sang a duet whereas Deirdre and Mike duetted in a very different manner.

A miserable Christmas on the Street in 1983. Len is dead and Rita reels from revelations about his affair. However, after half a dozen vodkas and a rowdy chorus of "Hold your hand out, naughty boy" on the cobbles, life suddenly seems better. I made that up. Elsie has a lonely yuletide but the arrival of old flame Bill Gregory gives her the possibility of a happy new year. Curly Watts declares his love for Sharon 'kennels' Gaskell in a poem.

More strife at Christmas 1984 as Bill Webster decides to leave but young Kevin refuses to pack his bags and in a fit of spite, grows a Village People moustache. Jack hacks a piece from Percy's Christmas tree and takes it home to Vera. At the Rovers, Gordon Lewis laughs at the notion of Bet as manager. You won't be laughing for long Mr Lewis . . .

1985 sees Emily play host to Percy and Phyllis who manage to call a truce for the day. Susan Barlow upsets Christmas at number one by going out for a drink with Mike. A Vimto for Susan and Horlicks for Grandad? Meanwhile Sam Tindall is unaware that his prize plum pudding has been squashed by Alf Roberts' backside.

Gail tells 'our Brian' that can have access to 'our Nicky' over the holidays. Mike decides not to make any attempt to see his son Mark again or until the plotline calls for it. Bet empties the staff tips box at the Rovers to find it full of small change. Jack is devestated. Happy 1986.

1987 and most of the UK is tuned into see Hilda wave farewell to her Muriel but not before a sentimental fireside chat with Sally Webster. Audrey opts for a lazy Christmas Day much to the chagrin of Ivy and Gail. Mavis gets maudlin and drunk at Rita's.

A frantic Christmas for Ken in 1988 when Deirdre goes missing. He suspects her of having an affair but, incredibly, Deirdre and her perm have been kidnapped. She eventually escapes but 'Tracy luv' is traumatised. That could explain a lot. In a fit of Christian charity, Emily plays host to Mavis, Derek, Bet, Alec and Phyllis.

1989 and another case of 'it's all about me', courtesy of Deirdre. Ken's affair with town hall trollop Wendy Crozier is now out in the open. Jack sobers up after seeing Father Christmas on a factory roof, little knowing that it is actually Derek. Gail gives Ivy a "move on, girlfriend" message by consigning Brian's photo to the back of a drawer.

Full marks to Emily then for assembling stranger and stranger combinations of people around her Christmas table. Give the woman a Babycham!


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